That’s the million-dollar question.
Most often it’s because we are scared of change. It’s scary when you’re learning new things. The uncertainty of knowing whether the relationship will last or not is sometimes too powerful to overcome.
Like breaking a bad habit, a person needs to leverage their experiences to create enough momentum and follow through with a commitment,
Author Lyndsay Katauska offers an excellent point of view in her article, “Why it’s easy to be afraid of commitment?”
Doing the same thing over and over again leads to two things:
- Repeating the same mistakes.
- Getting (and staying) stuck.
Even though we read and hear from many people how to make our relationships better, it often takes experiencing a bad relationship (or many), before we decide what we are doing isn’t working, and we need to learn something new.
Many of us like to learn from experience, before we decide in order to get more of what we want, instead of more of the same, that we’re going to have do something differently so we don’t experience more of the same: flailing or failure.
Sometimes we think and even try (unsuccessful attempt after another) to change the other person in our relationship. Are you at that aha moment of realizing that the only common denominator in your relationships is: you?
Therefore, the only thing you do have control over changing is (gasp): yourself?
Click Here to read Lyndsay’s full article.